Ugly House Photos

We’re trying to find something nice to say about this house.

They saved money by not paying for a building permit for the room addition?  The back door is eco-friendly?  They recycle?  The electric panel is accessible?

They save time & energy by not having landscaping?  They didn’t waste money on a concrete driveway?  It’s a big lot?

The refrigerator is included with the sale?  The house has gas service?  The gas line serves as a cup holder?

The cabinets look new?  There’s a window above the sink?  Nice.

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A major toilet paper company is beta-testing an ultra soft toilet paper in Phoenix.  It’s pastel yellow and comes in big rolls.

If you want to curl your hair, just grab the red wire and the black wire while showering!

The kitchen’s much more spacious now without the cabinets.

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Some thumbtacks and a piece of cardboard will cover up that hole nicely.  Buyers won’t even notice.

We’ll install our own electric service panel without city permits.  We’ll put the weatherhead on a six foot pole ourselves.  There’s no need to consult with the local power company (gosh, their 42″-48″ max height rules suck anyway).  Yep, we built the house ourselves too.  Who needs attic space?  Just make the roofline flush with the rooms’ ceilings.  It’s hot in Phoenix, so if you put the water heater outside in the sun, it’s like getting hot water for free.

We added electric wiring to the outside of the house.  Junction boxes mark where the wires go inside the house.

Don’t ask, ‘cuz we’re not telling.

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Some of our readers think these John F. Long (builder) cabinets look like chocolate bars.

Some owners paint over their ugly cabinets to make them uglier.

All of those notches, bumps, and such on the cabinet doors help collect & trap dust & grime.

If you get bored, you can play tic-tac-toe!

A rare John F. Long kitchen with a window over the sink plus a pantry.  This is the luxury model.

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Yep, that’ll keep the kids & babies & pets out of the pool.  No worries about drowning here.

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What were these people thinking?!!  Let’s hook up our dryer’s vent to the gas water heater and maybe it will help heat up the water.  Right.  So the blowing air won’t affect the gas flame.  Hmmm.

How about we store bleach and detergent next to the gas water heater??!!

We don’t need to maintain this walkway do we?  Buyers won’t fall & trip when they visit.  That’s what insurance is for, right?

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With bank-owned homes, the seller (the bank) does not provide any disclosure or history about the house.  And they do not repair any issues; it is sold in “as is” condition.  Thus the burden is on the buyer to discover any weaknesses.

My client recently beat out 13 other buyers on a 1959 foreclosure house in Phoenix.  The house itself looked to be in great shape, but the home inspection told a different story.

Cracked truss in the attic.

The wiring in the attic is a mess.  Someone spliced in extra wiring into the romex wiring and wrapped it in tape.

Another view.  Exposed wires sitting on wood.  Examples like this were found throughout the attic.  If you were a landlord and didn’t fix this (or know about it) and there was a fire, how do you think your tenants would react? L-a-w-s-u-i-t.

A cable wire just ends for no reason.

So that’s why there was no exhaust hood over the stove in the kitchen.
The insulation in this attic maxed out at about 1/2 inch.  Probably gives this house an R-minus10 rating.

The wood shake shingle roof looked fine from the outside, but from the attic it looked like Swiss cheese.  Sun poured in at at least twenty spots.  Here’s a gap under an attic vent, big enough for a golf ball (or rat) to pass through.

The main electric panel (from 1959) did not have a main shut-off; in an electric emergency, you’d have to switch off 7 breakers.  This might have been code back then, so can we really complain?  Well, let’s take a look at the two subpanels.  The main panel feeds into the subpanel on the right but bypasses it to the one on the left then feeds back to the one on the right.  Follow that?  Note that the left subpanel has a thick white grounding wire but the right subpanel is missing that wire (red circle).  Hmmm.

$2500 for a new electric panel, at least $1000 for rewiring in the attic, $4000 for a new roof, $2000 for pool replastering, at least $500 for attic insulation.  That’s $10,000 right there.  The buyer cancelled the contract.

Photos courtesy of Brian Quisberg, Inspector/Owner of Desert Estates Home Inspections.

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These three San Diego homeowners are going to be in for a shock when the buyers run away or ask for electrical repairs after seeing these safety hazards.

Electrical spaghetti.  Watt where they thinking?

Creative wiring.  At least they’re labeled??

Air freshener and nightlight too.  Wanna bet the outlet’s not GFCI protected?

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Messy houses are featured on A&E TV’s “Hoarders” show.  Photos of dirty houses are seen on websites like this one.  But to truly appreciate the splendor of these homes, you have to experience them in person by sight, smell, touch, and aftertaste.  I had the pleasure of visiting this Phoenix home on Sunday after being told of it by its neighbor.

Warning:  The photos shown here might be upsetting to some viewers.  We will ease you in slowly to the dirt, dust, & filth.  You have been warned.  Just be glad you can’t smell it.

When someone hangs flystrips in a bedroom, you know there’s a problem.

The house has a heavy smell of cats.  Lots of them probably.  According to the neighbor, the landscaping was completely overgrown; the front & back yards have since been scraped down to dirt.  The house inside has been cleared out, but you can imagine it was packed to the gills.  Spider webs are found in every room of the house as you can see here.

People live in filth for physical, mental, emotional, and/or financial reasons.  This is the master bathroom.  Can you imagine using this bathroom?  Ick.

See the yellow wall to the right of the sink in the above photo?  This is what that wall looks like.  The place was so disgusting that they removed the cabinet.  Rats nested in the bathroom cabinet and peed & pooped on the wall.  Sorry…you were warned.

Hold your breath and walk over to the kitchen’s breakfast area.  This is where you’d enjoy a cup of coffee?

The kitchen cabinets were removed because they were so disgusting.  The dark dots are empty cockroach egg sacs.

Aren’t cockroaches fun?

Rat poop in the stove burner trays.  Lots of it.  Gag.

The cat pee smell, the spider webs, the roaches, the rat poop, and filth gave me the heebie jeebies.  I went home and took a shower.

In the next post, we’ll look at the damage from neglect.

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The New Orleans Saints will beat the Minnesota Vikings today because:

1) They have reflected on their strengths just like this motorcycle is reflected in a mirror in a New Orleans attic.

2) Their old & tried methods are working.  Just like this old and tired wallpaper.

3) And their safety is hazardous to opponents, just like this dangling light that is a safety hazard.

4) Their defense will put gas on the flame.  Here we see a New Orleans home owner trying to convert his electric range to a gas range.

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