Ugly House Photos

Yes, the seller actually paid someone to paint the beehive fireplace in those colors.  The blending of pastel green with pink is interesting to say the least.

[Read more →]

They built a shrine for their family photos.

Clutter in the family room.  Clutter in the kitchen too.  Clear it all out.

Pan to the right and we see more clutter, a baby in a swing, a soda machine (!), a person standing to the right, and an unevenly painted wall.  What would you put away?

The dining room looks really cluttered from this angle.

Too much furniture and whatnot in the master bedroom.  Doesn’t look very inviting or relaxing.

[Read more →]

It’s amateur hour again for these 5 home sellers.

Thank you for patching a thousand holes.  Now how about painting over the uneven red paint?

You’re supposed to paint in the grout grooves too.

At least this guy/gal painted the grout grooves, but the color contrast creates a fake brick look.

Uneven, too thin coat of paint.

Paint fail.

[Read more →]

It’s supposed to resemble something.  Twig and berries, Austin Powers?

It’s almost like you’re actually at a Tuscan village.

We needed one more photo for the post.  The bed’s made and the colors match, so what’s to whine about?  The date stamp’s a little old for 2010; it might scare off buyers.

[Read more →]

Five homes with faux paint.

Feather duster faux paint in the master bedroom.

Faux ocean water.  Faux coral reef.  Faux seagulls (or bats?).

Poor rolling technique.

Ridiculous in St. Charles, Illinois.

They faux’d the kitchen cabinets in Bangor, Maine.

[Read more →]

They must have the world’s worst soap and no towels.  How else do you explain the pink handprints on the bathroom wall?

[Read more →]

Maybe she ate some of the orange lead-based paint and it made her a bit cuckoo?

[Read more →]

What a depressing back of the house.  Wires and pipes going all over like spaghetti.  No patio cover to block out the hot Arizona sun.

They added a patio cover to the side of the house.  However, notice that the wood posts are placed directly in dirt and connect directly to the house.  This is like putting out the red carpet for termites.  Earth-to-wood contact is what termite inspectors call this.

A Piglet mural plus outdated parquet flooring in the bedroom.  Oh, Pooh.  We were hoping the inside was better than the outside.

[Read more →]

Anyone can paint a wall, but only some can paint it well.  Those dots on the red wall: were there watermelon seeds glued to the wall?

Let’s just smear paint all over the window panes.

If we sponge on some orange and yellow paint, buyers won’t notice the rusted window or the mismatched tile.

[Read more →]

Looks like a nice living room with nice flooring.  Let’s remove the family photos and fake flowers.  And the pillows on the windowsills.  Could someone please get the kid at the front door?  Thanks.

How about waking up the kid on the couch?  Gold lamé drapes.

Spiderman!!  Pokeman too!

Bad paint job.

[Read more →]