Ugly House Photos

Oh good grief.  (eyes rolling).  When buyers visit this Phoenix home, the seller plays the piano while the buyers pick out the mylar balloon they want; then the seller inflates it for them.  Clever marketing idea?  Bad flooring.  Dolls, doilies, & more foolishness.

I had to adjust the brightness of this photo by +140.  Should have left it dark.  Bedroom with two plates, a pot, a hat, a basket, two purses, diapers, and a bunch of whatnot.

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Here’s a Phoenix home with design elements from all of the past 5 decades.

Working the 1980s and 1990s in the master bathroom.  Gotta love all that brass and wallpaper.

And back to the 1960s in the living room.  What a cool space.

A bit of the 2000s with a newer TV.  Check out the pelican on the hearth.  They must have had some killer parties here in the 1960s and 1970s.

Flowery wallpaper in the kitchen.  This home could look really cool with the right updating.  Lots of open spaces throughout.

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Home staging was not a priority for these sellers.  “What you see is what you get” is their attitude.  Cute little dog?

More stuff!  At least the dog’s out of this photo.

Messy kitchen.

Picture from the 1980s.  Another doll.

Another dog.  Dirty carpet.  Ugly couch piled high with junk.

The gate keeps the dogs away.  The clutter keeps buyers away.

There’s that dog again.

Ugly back yard.

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We have five more examples of one item dominating a real estate photo.

Are they selling a home gym or the home?

Are they selling the yellow cord winder or the home?

Are they selling the gigantic bird cage or the home?

Are they selling the family photos & frig magnets or the home?

Are they selling the swinging clown or the home?  The motorcycle and dozens of family photos are not included.  Sorry.

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The Ugly House Photos national tour visits beautiful Paterson, New Jersey this week.  Let’s check out some typical homes for sale starting with this charmer.

Two layers of ugly wallpaper in this creepy bedroom.  The bedspreads are, uh, quaint.

Ugly old egg crate mattress pad in another dreary bedroom.  Why not just remove the pad?  Old furniture.

Dirty walls and a sad fireplace in the living room.  Can you imagine seeing this home on a cold, dark winter day?

More dirty walls in the dining room.

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Another Paterson, New Jersey home in need of home staging and updating.

Dark wallpaper in the living room.  Too many family photos.  And old TV.

Pan to the left and we see haphazard furniture, green carpet, and gold drapes.

Earthquake?  Another old TV and ugly wallpaper in the kitchen.

At least the bed’s made.  Blue drapes and blue carpet.

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Sad little kitchen before.

Happy kitchen after renovation in 2010.

Depressing bathroom before.

Cheerful bathroom after remodeling.

Sleepless bedroom before.

Peaceful bedroom after (not the same room as above).

Dark den before.

Expanded after to create a great room.

View of the living room after.  This remodeled home sold quickly.

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Frozen in time.  Scottsbluff, Nebraska home built in 1975.  Wanna bet these are original owners?  Triple mirror.  Hanging oil lamp (aka rain lamp).  Tulips lights.  Classic.

Teddy bear collection to go with the old drapes.

Pan a bit more to the right.

The basement features orange carpet, one of those hideous frilled shade lamps, wood paneling, and an old dinette set.

Shifting slightly to the right, we see a million family photos.

The original bathroom features a Princess slimline phone for those long conversations.

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Springfield, Missouri where they like huge furniture.

More big furniture in the dining room.  And some wine casks.  And jars with beta fish?

That’s a lot of wine bottles.

A big tub of lard in the kitchen?

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[Let us take a brief break from snarky comments and just enjoy these photos]

Today we’re traveling back to the 1950s.  Time has stood still at this Petersburg, Virginia home.

Some 1970s design elements too.

Crushed velour chairs!

Awesome bathroom.

Groovy wallpaper.

Original 1950s kitchen cabinets & oven.

Large dining room.

Close-up of the chandelier.

Fun times in the basement.

Wet bar and a God’s Eye art piece.  Good times.

The sunroom.  With Astro-Turf?

Thank you to Mikey Fuller and photographer Wanda Bond for these great photos.

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